I haven't figured this out yet . . .
I have no idea what to do with my daughter’s hair. It’s out of control. She’s had a full head of hair from the day she was born and has only had one bangs trim her entire life. Apparently, women are weird about cutting a girl’s hair when she’s small because my sister didn’t get a hair cut until she was four and my wife protests cutting C’s hair as well.
So I’m stuck looking after a girl with long, wild hair that I can’t tame. If there are other dads out there who’ve mastered the art of girl hair, please let me know how to master it as well.
Hair clips don’t work, as demonstrated in the above picture. By the way, please forgive the horrible color combination of an orange hair clip with a green dress.
Seriously, my wife bought enough hair ties and small clips to hold up a girl’s hair on prom, and they are useless to me. I blame a combination my giant and awkward fingers, C’s thin, wispy hair, and the fact that she never holds still while I try to put a clip in.
I’m jealous of my wife because she manages to put these miniature hair accessories on, no problem. After watching me muff several attempts, she usually takes over and is done in ten seconds.
I was serious about my solicitations on how to apply the tiny hair accessories because my wife is keeping it a secret from me. I think she finds my hair handicap amusing.
Until recently, I didn’t think C’s hair being in her face was a big deal. She fights me whenever I try to clip it up and it doesn’t seem to bother her that it’s always in her face, even though it manages to curl right into her eyes as if her eyes have some magnetic pull on her hair. That was, until my wife came back from the ophthalmologist one day with news that she had a scratched cornea, from a tiny hair in her eye.
Ever since then, I’ve been paranoid that C’s corneas will get all scratched up and she’ll go blind because I’m too incompetent to properly clip her hair back. Luckily that hasn’t happened yet, but I’m still going to lobby for a bangs trim soon.
You know, I’d always wanted a daughter. A lot of men seem to be frightened at the prospects of having a girl. Now I understand why. It’s because we have no idea what to do with them.