I haven't figured this out yet . . .

Bonding Experiences

Those of you reading this post who know my wife well, know that she’s very competitive and always vying for our children’s love so that they like her more than me. I don’t really know why she bothers trying because they like her more than me anyway. But, since C spends a lot more time with me while G is at school, my wife honestly hasn’t had much one-on-one time with our daughter and today was the day. Which meant that I got to have father/son time, even if G didn’t want it.

It seems like it’s been a really long time since my wife and I have spent quality, weekend one-on-one time with our kids. It’s kind of nice to just spend time with G because he doesn’t really like me right now, so he’s clinging to mommy. It’s cool. I don’t remember how old I was, but there was a time in my very early childhood when my father asked me if I liked him and I said I didn’t because he was brown. Who says karma doesn’t exist?

My father’s the sweetest man in the world, by the way, so I was a real jerk of a kid for saying that to him, besides the self-loathing and racist undertones of the comment. Now that I’m an adult and not an insensitive child, I love my father and look forward to the opportunities to seek out his wisdom. I hope that spending time with G will one day help him to feel the same way toward me.

It’s a really good idea for parents to spend one-on-one time with each of their children. Even if you have just one. I don’t think there’s a parent out there who would refute that and if there are, please give me your reasoning.

While G’s language skills are good enough to carry a conversation with him, the depth and meaning of those conversations is still lacking.¬†Regardless, one-on-one time gives me a chance to bond with my children and show them who I am personally, not as part of a parent team. So even though we can’t get to know each other better verbally, the time alone will suffice for now.

My experience with my kids when they’re alone with me is much less guarded than when my wife is present, which makes sense. If you were being teamed up on by two people to get you to do something (take a bath, brush teeth, etc.), you would be much more defensive about it too. Vice versa, I think most parents behave differently when they’re alone with their children than when a spouse is present.

The one-on-one time can be spent doing anything. So, today for our father and son bonding excursion, we went to the aquarium.

As you can see, he wasn't thrilled to be there with me at first.

G warmed up to me when he saw this Komodo Dragon and couldn't contain his enthusiasm to point it out to me. It's pretty awesome to see your kids excited about something and want to share it with you.

We even played explorer for a little bit at the aquarium.

It’s nice to let your other children know you missed them while you were with another . . .

. . . even if they're not happy you're back.


One comment on “Bonding Experiences

  1. Julie Burns
    March 3, 2012


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This entry was posted on March 3, 2012 by in Family, Parenting and tagged , , , , , , , , .
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